Now that I have ruined the Christmas story, I can move on to ruining Solstice
Assignment: Write Solstice reflection. Result: NOT SOLSTICE REFLECTION.
Read MoreThe Magical Advice Giving Formula that will get kids to stop what they are doing and hang intently on every word of your wisdom
Warning: You will need to have some wisdom ready.
Other warning: That part is harder than you would think.
You are not failing to Christmas properly
Odds are, you are Christmas-ing exactly right.
Read MoreThere's something missing from those Nativity scenes...
Specifically, blood and guts and screaming. There should be blood and guts and screaming.
Read MoreTheology from 14 year olds. Which, by the way, is an improvement on theology from 39 year olds.
Eric: And the other elective I will take next year is food safety. I will get a certificate!
Me: No. I forbid it.
Eric. What—why?
Me: You and I both know that if you get a food safety certificate, you will follow me around the kitchen offering helpful tips and I do NOT WANT HELPFUL TIPS.
Read MoreWhy socialization really is a strong enough force to keep her in the room when she wants to leave.
“Why didn’t she leave, if it was hurting her?” A guy friend asks me.
I forget which of the many news stories of harassment we were discussing, but it involved some all-powerful guy and some way-less-powerful woman. There was no force involved, there was nobody blocking the path to the exit.
Read MoreWhy I left seminary
Interestingly, the fact that I don't believe in God was not a problem. It was an entirely different kind of loss of faith.
Read MoreI am SO glad we had all those bed bugs
Anthony (then 7): I’m writing about how we got bed bugs.
Me: What? Why?
Anthony: It’s asking how we spent the summer. So I’m writing about fighting bed bugs. Because that’s how we spent the summer.
Read MoreThe Holiday Dildo Story
You're welcome, internet.
Read MoreWhy is Minister Eyre so focussed on attacking “infusion”, and why does it matter?
Minister Eyre said that Treaty Education "is mandated by the government and that will not change". Why isn't that good enough? What's the big deal about "infusion" or not?
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